October 10, 2008

More Election Issues

Aaron of Axels, Loops and Spins wrote and asked me about Energy policy. (Confession - I just discovered his website yesterday and it's amazing! I can't believe I've missed it all this time.)

So here you go Aaron, two more policies for today -

Energy: As a show skater, you might think that we were/are athletes in prime condition and I would say, in my case, you would be wrong. Remember, the nice thing about skating the same show everynight ... you don't need to practice anymore. Your body goes on automatic pilot - even for the principals and their triple jumps. Of course, the showgirl diet of wine and cigarettes, may help one look better from a far, but doesn't really help out the cardio.

So for one Capades skater, who always picked between his A, B or C show, you can probably guess what he gave you on a Saturday matinee of a three show day. (That's a hint for you the next time you buy tickets for Disney On Ice. Don't go with the 10:30 am show on a Thursday.)

The best part of my energy plan was in Japan, where I got hooked on a drink from a tiny little brown bottle called "Real Gold." It was the perfect choice between shows, when I didn't want a big ol' sandwich to show up in my gut halfway between the bra and g-string costume. It was a combination drink of vitamins, caffein, and nicotine. Liquid Cigarettes that tasted like a Flinstones chewable! Mmmmmm! Couldn't get enough of those, because like real cigarettes, I got addicted.


War: I tried to stay out of them. But many times the dressing room was on the front line. They were often between the principal and understudy, but two chorus girls fighting over the same guy could produce some damamge too. In my tenure, I witnessed the usual screaming, swearing and backstabbing, heard rumors of costume tampering, planting evidence (of the snack food kind) and undeserved fines. But most of the wars did not go nuclear, because of the close quarters we were in. Living, working and socializing together. So unless you were planning to quit the show with your skates still on (it happened), you had to plan your attack carefully.

Stay tuned for the running mate - I'm vetting the short list this weekend!

1 comment:

Aaron said...

They should bring "Real Gold" to the U.S. and market it. Red Bull wouldn't stand a chance!

Now if we could only get our President to take your position on war...

Thanks for your insights!