October 8, 2008

Election Issues

Okay, as I was scrambling for a topic today ... (How do Lifeskate and Required Elements do it? Hats off to you!) I realized I've been too distracted reading up on the election.

Maybe living in another country right now gives me an excuse to hang on every word and every other article, but I've got to slow it down. I've known who I was going to vote for since the primaries and unless one of the candidates bites the head off of a chicken in the next debate, all the news I can digest won't change my mind.

So allow me to get back to the world of ice shows and answer the election issues as only a show skater would.

Economy: For skaters of the chorus variety, this is not a good outlook. Most of the shows I did, I was pretty poor. Right down there with starving artist/perpetual student status. Indeed, in Holiday On Ice, the skaters had to pay for their own hotel rooms (like Capades and domestic Disney), so sometimes by the end of the week, there wasn't enough money to eat. But on the bright side, that helped my weigh-in at the end of the week.

Health Care: What health care? Actually, I was covered in Holiday, but the rumor was try not to get sick in your first year, because you have to pay H.E.P.A. out of pocket first and then wait years for reimbursement.

It seemed a little better for Capades - as long as you got sick or injured on the ice. Hello workman's comp! Yes, there is the story of one skater who busted his ankle skiing on his day off, hobbling into work the next day, putting on his skates and gingerly walking to the ice backstage in order to fall and scream out "My ankle!"

It was a little better for me in Japan - where you were fortunately covered by government insurance, but unfortunately, I couldn't understand a thing the doctors said to me. I developed a nasty rash under my arms in the third month I got there (spread it down the pinwheel and earned the nickname "Germ Queen") and went to the doctor for medicine. In Japan, doctors earn money by how many prescriptions they provide, meaning I walked out with six different creams and no idea which one might work.

and finally

Foreign Policy: I skated in eight different countries, so I gained experience after being so naive at first. In fact, by my fourth show in Japan, I became the unofficial tour guide to Tokyo for the new skaters. From my own trial and error, I showed them the shopping highlights (Harajuku's Takeshita Dori), which bars to enter after the requisite stop to the Hard Rock in Roppongi (Deja Vu or the Train Bar) and where to hang out while you're completely spent - both literally and figuratively - waiting for the 6 am trains to start up (the upstairs of Mister Donut).

So there are my election issues. In my next post, I'll tell you about my running mate. I'm open to suggestions!


Aaron said...

What insights do you have on Energy! Hahahahahahahaha

Ice Charades said...

Oooooh, that's a good one!

Laura@Requiredelements said...

I love this post! What a fun idea.