Attention All Ballet Teachers

I went to a ballet class yesterday for the first time in nineteen years. This time in a different country and a different language, but it's always the same thing. I got called out because my butt was sticking out.

Even though I don't know the Spanish words for "Tuck in your butt," I knew what the teacher was saying.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait a minute, Ice Charades, back up. What were you doing in a ballet class? You don't even skate anymore, are you insane?

Why, yes, thanks for asking. A nice gal from Ecquador talked me into taking classes with her, but she used to be a dancer. Not me. And you can tell when a skater takes ballet lessons.

We can't tuck in our butts, because we have sway backs. And the late, great choreographer Brian Wright, who experienced the same, drove the point home to me when doing this experiment.

Okay, skaters, get off the couch now and get into the landing position. A nice deep one, arms checked. See how your back sways to balance the stretch? Put your free leg down and slowly stand up keeping you back in the exact same position. Got it?

Unfortunately, that doesn't look good when doing a grand plie.

But you skaters need to know this if you take ballet classes (and you should take ballet classes.) If you don't have time to demonstrate this to your ballet teachers, tell them when you skate with blades that extend two inches past your heel, your center of balance has to shift to compensate.

I hope that will keep the teachers off your back, no pun intended, until you wow them with killer chaines turns.