December 25, 2010

And #1 - Lessons On Becoming An Expert

Merry Christmas from Ice Charades

And the fans' #1 post for 2010?

Lessons On Becoming An Expert
This is why I shouldn't teach skating ...

If I did teach skating, I would say something like ... "Okay, for an axel, get lots of speed, lift your free leg at this extension and this angle and pull in tight. Now go practice it for two years and get back to me."

The picture is by Alexia Tsotsis, and the explanation on why it is so hard to become an expert comes from Ben Casnocha's blog, and I discovered the whole thing via the Daily Dish.

December 24, 2010

#2 - What Should She Wear?

This post is long but it got the most hits of the year. Enjoy.

What Should She Wear?

I'm having fun with this, so please indulge me.

When I was googling Venus William's images I saw a shocking array of tennis outfits on display. Full disclosure: some of the crazy outfits belong to Serena, so it's a family affair. Below are some of the latest. This looks like an outfit I had back in 89 ...

I think she borrowed this from the Cancan production of HOI in 83 ...

But you probably only saw this dress from the back ...

Venus gets hammered a lot on these outfits of choice, especially when it looks like she's not wearing pants or underwear. You get a lot of these from google images:

But let's get back to her outfits ...

It seems as if the tennis world is coming closer to needing to look as good as you play. Or cynical me, says that Nikes and Addidas better leave room for Donna Karan, Ralph Lauren, de la Renta and the rest. Now tennis is still objective - no judges judging costumes and style points, just whether the ball was on the line or out.

But when I saw this on Ana Ivanovic and it reminded me of Nancy Kerrigan's dress that was designed by Vera Wang.

Is this wave of outfits looking more like something from Ice Capades something that will stick? If so, she's in luck. Holiday On Ice has some already for sale ... how easy is that? She can afford the express mail, she could get one of these beauties in a week!

So, play along boys and girls - what would you have Venus wear?

Cue the legless wonder manequin on the Holiday On Ice costumes website: This one looks a lot like the black number she already has. But Ice Charades, this one has a crown.

Or this one? This could work on the court ... probably not with real leather boots. How about pleather with built-in sneakers?

Okay these next two, you probably want to lose the head gear, but the outfits? Fringe could be fun.

Or if she wants a more serious look:

Send in your vote!

December 23, 2010

#3 - The Sequel

#3 post talks about trends in books for 2010.

Any book requests on your Christmas list this year? pssst - how about the one of the right side of the screen? It's not too late to ask Santa, you know. Uh, yes it is Miss Ice Charades ... unless you want to pay a gazillion dollars in shipping. Good point, perhaps you can order it after Christmas to go with that new Kindle of yours. Stay tuned.

Anyway - here's the post ...

The Sequel

I got an email this weekend ...

"I just finished Ice Charades and loved it. Is there a sequel coming out?"

Hey, thanks.

Sequel? Well, I'm working on it. Still tinkering with it, I hope to get it out at the end of 2012. Books can take time, sorry.

I was wondering how to give the next one wider appeal. Should I market it to the Young Adult crowd? Take out all of the questionable adult behavior?

Psst, hey Charades ... what's an ice show without questionable adult behavior?

Okay, good point. Maybe I need to throw in a vampire. Worked for Twilight. But I could have a skating vampire.

the first skating vampire from Ice Follies circa 1975

Hey, most of the shows skaters were nocturnal anyway. And think if I had a vampire in the story, my book could be linked to Twilight on Amazon's: Readers Who Like Twilight Also Liked ...

But the young adults out there might be sick of vampires by the time Ice Charades Two comes along.

So based on reports from the BAE (Book Exports America) the latest genre publishers are excited about is ... wait for it ... Amish Romance. Yep, Amish Romance.

Think about it - the religion doesn't allow one to watch tvs or use the internet or IPods, they are the perfect audience for reading books. But how to weave an amish showgirl into my next book? As far as I know, none have ever gotten serious in skating.

Let's face it - skating is not green, not Amish-friendly. You may not need electronics to physically skate, but probably would not be allowed to use the energy for the compressors that keep ice cold, lights to light an ice show, or anything to do with false eyelashes or rhinestones.

Any other ideas?

December 22, 2010

#4 - Costumes For Sale

In continuing with the countdown, I'm going to the Holiday On Ice - Costumes For Sale website. I had fun with these folks this year. I'm still wondering how the sales are going. But here you have the first post at #4.

Costumes For Sale

Tired of the same ol' competition dress?

You can have this ...

Looking for something new to wear to the office?

You can wow them with this ...

Planning to out do Lady Gaga at the next Halloween party?

Hey what happened to the other leg of the mannequin? Is that the Heather Mills-edition for Dancing On Ice? ouuuuchhh - that was cruel, Miss Ice Charades.

No, these costumes and many more are for sale by Holiday On Ice. Really!

Go here and check them out. Tell me which ones are your favorite. And since they don't have any prices listed, tell me what it would cost you.

December 21, 2010

Ice Charades Top 5 Posts of 2010

Yes, folks, we're coming to the end of the year. Everyone loves a countdown, right? So I thought I would post my top 5 to get you to Christmas.

I've heard from the legions of Ice Charades fans (my mom and Jane) and the votes are in ... today's post comes from April, 2010.

Title Contest!

As you've seen reported on other blogs like Required Elements and Axels, Loops, and Spins, Johnny Weir will release on book in Jan 2011.

Aaron wrote:
Well, the speculation can end. It was announced today that he has entered into a deal with Simon & Schuster imprint Gallery Books to publish a yet to be named book.

As someone who's been there, I can tell you it takes a lot of time to write a book. No, kidding, Ice Charades - 5 years? Seriously? And you had a lot of time on your hands.

Yes. Yes I did. And I know Johnny Weir is a busy busy boy, so I thought we could help him out. At least with the "yet to be named" part of the book.

Any ideas?

I've got three,

Weir Not Going To Take It

Weir So Beyond This

Bravo Johnny Bravo

Okay, that last one is for the "15 and under Cartoon Network" crowd. But hey, I bet you can do better - come on, tell me what you would name his book. There could be prizes!

December 18, 2010

Happy Birthday Brian!

I am and always will be a HUGE fan and WOW, what a year you've had.

Happy Birthday, hope it's a great one.

December 15, 2010

The Nutcracker and the Plump Sugar Fairy*

*Plump Sugar Fairy brought to you by my good friend, John Niles Merrill

I caught a segment on the Today show the other day, which featured Jenifer Ringer, the NYC Ballet's Sugar Plum Fairy in this season's Nutcracker. You've probably heard the hububaloo about how "fat" she is, but if you haven't, click here.

On the Today show, they showed video of her dancing and I must say her frame was bigger than what we're used to when watching prima ballerinas, but you know what I also noticed was that she was an outstanding dancer in the role, so I wasn't bothered by her size. As you can see from the photo below, her "form" ain't bad.

I'm glad that she didn't want an apology from the New York Times critic who called her fat, because this is what comes with the territory.

But my gut feeling, which is a lot bigger than hers, btw, is that she'll be scrutinzing the bathroom scale once again. Even though she has battled and triumphed over eating disorders, all of this attention will set up a new battle for her.  There was national and international attention over this.

Do you think she feels free to order the "Death By Chocolate" dessert at any restaurant after the show now?

December 10, 2010

What's So Great About Figure Skating?

Right now Ryan at is having a contest. And there is a prize!!!

Click here to go to You Tube to and here from the man himself.

It is hard for me to articulate why skating's great(and sometimes I would argue otherwise) but last night I saw a car commercial where they think it's great.

You know how Miss Ice Charades is always ranting that they never show skaters in the cruise ship or amusement park commercials for cruise ships or amusement parks that have ice shows? No, oh, welcome to my blog, then.

Anywhooo, finally a commercial with skating in it!

It starts with the typical stock footage of car driving near the ocean or car frolicking in the snow with happy people inside looking like they just finished a photo shoot for the Gap. Then spliced in for only a second at a time were the following clips in this order:
woman riding a horse
girl swinging on a swing
guy doing a trick on a snowboard
businessman loosening his tie
figure skater landing a jump


person standing on the top of a mountain

The ad is saying all of these things are great feelings.

Of course, driving a Suzuki will get you there too.

My hunch is that someone writing the commercial had to be a skater. Why? They didn't show a figure skater doing a pretty spiral or fast spin or split jump or some other move that plays well for the camera. They showed someone landing a jump in slow motion, which isn't the prettiest move when viewed in that clip.

But it's one of the sweet spots in skating.

The point where you haven't landed the jump, but you know you will. You've cleared enough rotation with some air left to go and all things are good now. And that moment in the air is an amazing feeling.

I imagine for your A-list skaters when they hit that spot in competition, they have already started to think about the next jump or difficult maneuver coming up in the program. If it's an ice show skater, when they hit that moment, they move on to thinking of where they'd like to go for dinner that night.

So, while this isn't an official entry for Ryan's contest, take a look at the commerical itself. Here's the link if you want to see the commercial.

Pssst. I think skating's getting a little respect again!

December 6, 2010


... and this blog!

No, crawlability isn't the latest hydroplaning move by one of the ice dance teams, it's what this blog needs when I looked into freelancing opportunities.

I was thinking the other day, kinda hoping actually, to bring my blog up a notch, get a little more notoriety, go big time, or at least find a way to bring timely showgirl make-up tricks to the masses. But then I read the qualifications to get Ice Charades into one of the prestigious Blog Distribution Networks.

Hmmmm, let's break it down, shall we, and discuss why my blog won't be going anywhere ...

On their website they state:

All blogs will be reviewed by a member of our editorial team. Some of the main things they look for are:

•One or more postings per week minimum

...Ooops, I meant to get this out a few days ago, but that didn't happen and it's been a week now. If I didn't have a gazillion Ice Capades Reunion notices to post, I don't know what I'd write about.

•Family-friendly language and content

... Oh, shit. My last post had the caption, "Draw the rest of the fucking owl."

•Distinct, intelligent writing style

Well, I've got a distinct style at least.